valentine's day
One of our clients had a Valentine that her boyfriend sent her. She showed it off in group today. It was obviously home-made--the front had a drawing of a rose and a knife, and looked like it was modeled after a tattoo, which it probably was. The inside, which the client read to the group, said this:

I loved you in your frills,
and I loved you in your lace.
But most of all I loved you
when you sat on my face.

Next time I see you,
I'll buy your ass a rose...
and we'll have a good time
when you cum out of your pantyhose.


Ain't love grand?
- posted by not_jane_addams @ 1:36 PM

 
just another day
We have a new client here at the agency. Let's call her "Ann."

Ann is a little unusual. She seems to have the mentality of an 8 year old. She arrived here with a stuffed rabbit and a cowboy hat. Everything seemed to be moving along just fine--even though she's a little slow, she's nice to everyone and committed to the program.

I found a note on my desk this morning. Apparently, Ann had locked herself in her room by jamming a chair under the doorknob. The night shift heard loud noises coming from her room, and so they went to investigate.

"After forcing in the door [!], we found Ann naked except for her hat, straddling the chair backwards, with a cafeteria spoon in her vagina [!!], rocking back and forth, and pulling the ears of her stuffed rabbit and grunting. The grunting and the chair legs hitting the floor were the causes of the noises we had heard. She did not stop until forcably stopped by staff, at which time she became frightened. She hid under her blanket and shouted for all of us to go away."

The note goes on to suggest that I "follow-up" with Ann in an individual session.

I don't get paid enough.

- posted by not_jane_addams @ 11:52 AM

 
lunch
Every day the client's bitch about the food. Except for one client. Today that client had a discussion with another client:

"The food here is a crime. I can't believe they expect us to eat this," one client said.
"Yeah. Where were you living before you came here?" the other client asked.
"On the street," the 1st client responded.
"So the food was better on the street that it is in here?" the 2nd client asked.
"Well, not really..." the 1st began.
"Then shut the fuck up," the 2nd said.



- posted by not_jane_addams @ 1:12 PM